Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Or maybe you could yell, This is the police! and it'll open right up!

OK, Badger’s post re: posting kids’ photos on the Internet has sent some of us – well, me and Gina - into a tailspin. Gina and I exchanged several emails about issues surrounding posting our kids’ names and photos, and should we go back through the archives and delete? Gina suggested just deleting her posts altogether. Which I think would just suck, because I LIKE her posts.
A few months ago I changed the boys’ names to pseudonyms. And I recently decided that I will no longer post readily identifiable photos of the boys, and this policy now includes the baby, which it didn’t at first because he’s SO.DAMN.CUTE, and how could I not share? And I kinda think all babies look alike.
I don’t know that I’ll go through the archives and delete photos. I did offer to do it for Gina if she wanted me to. And I will.
I myself have never used my real name mostly due to a weird but ultimately harmless episode of stalking that happened lo these many years ago now. Also because, what if – in some alternate universe, but still - my mother-in-law learned to set up and plug in her computer, set up and access her email and the Internet, and somehow came upon THE BLOG? I can’t afford a divorce. Although she might see her way clear to lending me the money…
I don’t post pictures of myself because I am FAT. And I want you all to like me. And you might not if you saw how wildly unattractive I can be.
But my children? Are adorable. As some of you well know. And while Behind the Stove may never grow to Dooce-like proportions (God, I hope not! I couldn't take the pressure!), it’s still best to be safe and cautious and what not with your readership. Because you know, for all we really know, one of us may be an axe murderer, or a black-market body-organ profiteer. Or – this is where I get serious – a pedophile. The thought of any sicko seeing my little boys on their computer screen and then twisting those images to suit their own perverted fantasies makes my skin crawl and my stomach roil. So, those of you who have seen my kids, I am glad you got to. Because have I mentioned that they are adorable? And those who haven’t – sorry. I can’t post pictures of them anymore. At least not close-ups or identifiable ones. Because I need to be able to sleep at night. And let me tell you, with three children, I don’t do too much of that anyway.
I’m sorry if I am going on and on about this, but it really upset me, how naïve and careless I can be, with the most precious people in the world to me.


My plumber has (FINALLY!) come and gone, and I now have a functioning laundry pipe system/doohickey thing.
Let the Laundry Games begin!
[Oops. I spoke too soon. The babysitter just called me. She ran a load of towels and put them in the dryer and the DRYER DID NOT WORK. As in, the towels are still wet. As in, please just kill me now and put me out of the misery that seems to be my lot this week. Like having my mother-in-law fold all my towels.]


Literary snippets:

No, no idea why "The Poseidon Adventure" is on the brain. Sorry.

Scroll down for the winners of caption contest #25. All you librarian types will especially appreciate this.

Gina and I also figured out why I so enjoyed The Thief Lord but not so much Inkheart - different translator. Yes, we have become such geeks that the translator matters now. I spent fifteen minutes trying to find out if Inkheart had been translated by more than one person, in the hopes that I could still read it without being BORED. Of course, I did go out of my way several years ago to find Dante’s Inferno translated by Robert Pinsky, so I suppose I knew translation mattered. But still…it so explains the difference between the two.

I am thoroughly enjoying the latest Mary Russell, although the part where Holmes meets Dashiell Hammett is a leetle too…too. So far. But gosh, I have a weakness for heroes with tuberculosis. Color me weird. I also find Sherlock Holmes incredibly sexy. Color me even weirder, I suppose.

Don’t know what I want to read next. I am feeling out of sorts with everything right now, including my reading choices.

I just called one of circulation people the “”reserve goddess.” Which would be ok except HE is clearly a man. Fortunately for me, a man who is my friend. I need a drink or a nap or both.

The library is having their annual Scholastic book fair this week. I need to walk across the aisle and see if they have any Magic Tree House books, cheap, for the Primo. [They don’t. Bummer.] But check this book out: Montmorency: Thief, Liar, Gentleman? Looks pretty cool, eh?


All right. As you were.


Sarah Louise said...

Oh fussbudget. I understand but at the same time, c'mon!! But I do understand, but c'mon. Crap. Anyways, I am one of the lucky folk that get to see your boys in person fairly regularly...

and YOU. ARE. NOT. FAT. Don't let me hear you say that again. It's just not true. You may not be at the weight you desire, but that does not constitute FAT.

And if I thought my coin-op (but working) in my basement washer dryer would be of help...hey, if you want...I promise I would not fold your laundry--heck, I don't even fold my own!

I can't peruse the literary stuff now, but I'll come back and comment on that.

That is all. For now. (Mwah-ha-ha-ha)

blackbird said...

congrats on the plumbing.

Sorry if I fueled your anti photo mania...

everyone? you can blame ME.

Badger said...

Ack! Okay, you know I was only explaining why *I* don't do the photo thing, right? That it was just my own paranoia talking? I LIKE looking at pictures of other people's kids. It does weird me out a little, but only by extension, because it's something I'm too scared to do myself.

Oh, and I post pictures of me because I enjoy making people laugh.

BabelBabe said...

no, i know. but it still seems like more anonymity is better. give me a few weeks, i won't be able to resist showing you terzo crawling or whatever...

Surfing Free said...

Hmmm, I have to admit I have never really thought about the downside of posting photos of my children. I haven't done it very often cause, well ... if I started that I'd never stop. But then I thought about it and had a look at my flickr account and .. this might sound weird ... but the most viewed photos are of my daughter with her mouth open. Ummm, *shudder* I certainly hope there are no crazy photoshopping pedo freaks involved. But I am taking those photos down and it makes me sad because photos of my daughter laughing are ones I want to share:(

Carolyn said...

Since I put that my location is Stupid Town, CA, well that is anywhere and everywhere in CA. LOL

I feel okay with occasionally posting my kids pics because I can't help but share.

I do have a friend who posted a pic for her friends of her daughter in a diaper. She found out there was a guy who had a site with pics of kids in cloth diapers for other pedophiles to enjoy. He had copied her daughter's pic and put it on the site which made her sick to her stomach.

Sarah Louise said...

Now I won't be able to sleep tonight...

Except that BB's children are always fully clothed. (I think.)

Oh anyways, I just wandered over b/c I need to get a link for bec and kim and I was curious to see what everyone was sayin'

As you were...

Sarah Louise said...

With the entire Dewey Decimal System tattooed on Ernie's body, the library saved a ton of money on costly computer systems.


I found it curious (who was I having a discussion about labeling books for age levels) that the reviews for the Montmerency book said ages 9-12; ages 12-18; Ages 14 up; Gr 6-10. Uh-huh. It reminded me (a little bit) of a non-children's book I loved, The Dress Lodger. The scientific part and the night part. It doesn't look like Montm has to do with pleursy or consumption or ladies of the night... Okay, now I'm going.

That's That's all folkzzzzzzzzz!

MsCellania said...

Translators TOTALLY matter! They can turn a masterpiece into ho-hum dreadful.

So glad the plumbing works now but CRAP about the dryer. Our babysitter doen't fold stuff right either. I re-fold. I'm grateful it isn't left in a pile, but still...Funny how particular people are about their laundry. And how their beds are made.

6 years ago I emailed a photo of Oldest running naked toward the camera to 4 of my good friends. One emailed me back and said "DON'T DO THAT! You don't know who we are forwarding this email to, and so on and so on!" I was sick to my stomach for days. I immediately emailed everyone and begged them to delete the photo. They understood. None of them even thought about it, except for the one friend who alerted me. Since then, I have been more careful. It's terrible to have to be this neurotic, but porn is the biggest use of the internet. And sneaking innocent family photos seems to give an extra big thrill.

And you are not fat! Stop it!

And for those who are really worried, take your blog link off your profile. That way, people can't link to you from comments, etc. That will give you time to delete photos, assume pseudonyms, etc.

Carolyn said...

BTW, you posted a pic of yourself last week and YOU ARE NOT FAT!

So there.

Joke said...

Um, just edit the blog entries.


P.S. Any pervert so much as THINKS of my kids and s/he will be given a practical demonstration of how I feel about my 2nd Amendment rights. At close range.

Lazy cow said...

I understand the kid photo thing. I'd love to show close ups but I'm a little paranoid and my husband would KILL ME!!!
You know what I think about the fat issue.
And the library caption is hilarious.
Now you and Gina have me trawling the YA sections of my libraries. As if I need another category of books to read.

blackbird said...

just to round out the conversation here, I think I will mention that several years ago Middle's school music teacher posted a big effin photo of his face, with his name, one click away from the address of the school.
she is dead now.
I killed her.
(The kids LOVE seeing themselves on the internet! were her last words.)

Lazy cow said...

I've just deleted one TINY photo of my kids. And I had such a gorgeous one of the Boy to post today: asleep on the floor, bottom up. No way now I know what people can do to these photos. Shudder.

Badger said...

Okay, just to clarify again, my main concern is people being able to recognize my kids IRL (and know their names and whatnot). I have posted OLD photos of my kids (i.e., the boy's baby picture on his 10th birthday) and fairly recent photos in which their faces are obscured. The pr0n thing quicks me, yeah, but it's the whole abduction/unthinkable thing that scares the bejeezus out of me.

However, now I'm VERY glad I didn't post the naked butt baby picture on the boy's birthday. Ew.

Katya said...

bb: You posted a picture of you -- I know you are NOT fat. I'm fat and if I ever posted a picture of me you'd know that's true.

I understand why you won't be posting pictures of the boys anymore -- I'm just glad I got to see the ones you did post -- they are so darn cute.

I LOVED the caption contest, btw.

Gina: Please don't delete your old posts -- I like them.

Sarah Louise said...

Verbatim what Katya said. (Twins!)