Saturday, January 14, 2006

Wouldn't it be luverly?

This is the view from my bed. (The bed used to be in front of the window, but in the winter that blocks the radiator, not to mention that the windows are fairly drafty.)


View 2 from the bed, with my dresser I bought at the flea market for a hundred bucks last summer.


My nightstand. I am working through the pile of books, but there are more underneath. And I like to have a glass of water handy. Numerous though the times may be that I have knocked it over.

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Why is this my favorite room? Yes, it is only half-painted; the carpet needs to be ripped up; the window needs to be rebuilt; the curtains need to be hemmed; and it is generally the dumping ground for all clean laundry to be sorted and folded.

But it is mine, mine, mine, ALL MINE.

H. and I have a very Victorian arrangement in that we have separate bedrooms. This is mine; I scored the master bedroom because it is on the same floor as the boys' bedrooms and I am the one that gets up with them if necessary.

H.'s bedroom doubles as the second guest room, and is on the third floor. As he needs to be fully functioning at work everyday seeing as how he supports us, I thought it necessary that his room be somewhere he can get some sleep. I'll sleep when I'm dead.

Now our marriage is - while unique - stable, strong, and fairly pleasing to us both, but there was a time when it was not. Due in part to financial restraints and children, but mostly to sheer stubbornness on both of our parts, we determined to stay married. But our marriage has been crafted and remade into something that works for us, and that includes a separate, private space for each of us.

His bedroom looks - and always has - like a college dorm room.

I like my sheets to match, the surfaces to be minimally cluttered, my bed to be made, my lighting soft but bright enough to be inviting. I prefer to live like a grown-up.

So this is my favorite room - my private space, my retreat, the space that saved my marriage, saves my sanity, and soothes me. Now if I could actually get some sleep in it, it would be perfect.

Friday Show-and-Tell, courtesy of Blackbird

8 comments:

Sarah Louise said...

Blowkiss...and will you take me with you to flea markets this summer?

SL, who actually got some sleep this week (but is only reporting this, not gloating, because the balance, I know, is a balance-y one) What is that word?????????

blackbird said...

wow.
who knew?
a brilliant plan, and a nice looking room!

Badger said...

Dude! We have separate bedrooms too! Except DH only sleeps in his about 40% of the time. My fibromyalgia (and thus my need for quality REM sleep) plus his allergy/apnea issues made it a necessity.

We also have separate home offices. THAT'S what saved our marriage.

Caro said...

I'll sleep when I'm dead! I love that.

I am extremely jealous of you. Oh, to have my OWN space.

Many couples sleep in seperate rooms. I read a newspaper article on it.

My Mom hates sleeping with my Dad because he snores so loudly. His feelings get hurt about it. I bet if she kept HIM up all night he would get over it fast.

BTW, I love the paint color in your room and the mantel is beautiful.

Jess said...

That's a beautiful dresser. I think it would drive me crazy to have to deal with someone else's crap in my bedroom - unless there was a lot of room and a lot of storage. Actually, I know it would because I shared a cramped room with my sister until I left for college.

Kathy said...

Love the dresser. I thought there was something wrong with me because I want a separate bedroom from my husband, but other normal people do this too -- yay! This makes me feel better. I love my husband;; I just want my own space. He doesn't seem to need that but I do.

Major Bedhead said...

Oh, I'm jealous. When and if I ever own my own house, I think I shall propose this idea to That Canadian Boy I Married.

I love the dresser. It's beautiful.

Suse said...

How very Virginia Woolf.

I am envious (of the arrangement and the dresser).