She's like, so whatever, you could do so much better. - Avril Lavigne, "Girlfriend"

It's a snippet post, haven't done one in ages. But I am a little scattered at the moment, so here goes.

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I am wearing a pale blue, flowered April Cornell skirt that was given to me by a friend who lost thirty pounds using the Stressful Divorce Diet. It’s long and loose and cool (the skirt, not the divorce), but it’s totally frumpilicious, and completely bulks out my already-nonexistent waistline. (I am wearing it with a man’s white oxford button-down – Queen of Style, that’s me. I call this my Muslim look.) Plus, I keep rolling over it with the wheels of my roll-y chair at work at the ref desk. I am not only the Queen of Style, I am graceful as well.

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Per everyone’s requests, I would be thrilled – thrilled to pieces – to post a photo of my pretty new dress. I love it, and plan to wear it often. We have symphony tix Saturday and I will probably wear it again for that. I’ll take the photo then.

I do need different shoes for it – my pointy-toed leather slingbacks are not summery enough, and my black sandals (the “cruel shoes”) are sexy and strappy, but the straps are elastic – it takes hours for the marks on my feet to go away after I take off the shoes. What I need is a pair of (still) black, (still) strappy (maybe two, and definitely a thicker strap), heeled sandals to work with the dress; I do not want a wedge, I want a heel, and I definitely think they need to be mules. White would go with it, but I REFUSE to wear white shoes. (Unless they are tennis shoes, obviously. In which case, ONLY white will do.) Anyhoo, when I show you the dress, I also will show you the shoe candidates and perhaps you, my sweet little stylish 'netties, can help me pick.

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I meant to say thank you to all those who offered the stick-your-boobs-out advice. I must say, it worked : ) I thought of you all cheering me on, and I felt loved. Albeit by, rationally speaking, a bunch of women I have mostly never met in person – but loved nonetheless. So if any of you are really three-hundred-year-old perverted men who are just toying with me, don’t tell me now, ok?

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Onward and upward...

At the risk of revealing myself to be a total degenerate, I discovered Harry Potter porn last night. Like most fan fiction, lots of it was abysmally bad, some was decent, and one or two stories were perhaps well beyond the realm of possibility, but amazingly well-written. Nice to confirm that I am not the only woman out there who lusts for Severus Snape, or Draco Malfoy (which fact is most odd, as I normally don’t care for blonde men, but both Draco and his father fill me with lust. (Now I feel like Jimmy Carter. Ahem.))
The last time I got really engrossed in HP fan fic, turns out I knew the guy who was writing lots of it. So, you, and you know who you are, if you're writing HP porn, lemme know which ones are yours.

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I am THIS CLOSE to finishing I Know This Much is True. I enjoyed it very much, despite its Oprah certification : )

Next up: one of the following books, all ILLs from my job, which is definitely a terrific perk:

Bloodletting and Other Miraculous Cures: Stories - Vincent Lam. Our ILL department really went above and beyond for this one – it’s not held by many libraries, and the first request for it came back unfilled. But then my dear sweet ILL angel hand-requested it from the holding library, and lo and behold, here it is.

The Great Stink - Clare Clark. I know, I didn’t return it. I am thinking this might be next, as it seems like it’ll be a quick read.

The Plague and I– Betty MacDonald. I need to own this but until I find it used, this will suffice. I love MacDonald’s The Egg and I and think it’s one of the funniest books ever. I have high hopes for the entertainment quotient of this one.

Living the Good Life: Being a plain practical account of a twenty year project in a self-subsistent homestead in Vermont, together with remarks on how to live sanely & simply in a troubled world - Helen & Scott Nearing, and This Organic Life: Confessions of a suburban homesteader - Joan Dye Gussow. Both of these are positive backlash from the Kingsolver book. Until I get all my tomato plants in (I bought three Red Beefsteak Heirloom plants today), I need farming inspiration. (And did anyone notice how this was initially posted with that thought just hanging there in mid-air, completely unfinished? Welcome to my brain.)

This is one of those cases where 1)I have so much good stuff to read, I am virtually paralyzed and therefore do not know where to begin; and 2) I was at the library today and did not check out any books, because I already have a ton waiting for me at home.

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A couple of friends invited me to dinner tonight at a new restaurant called The Library. I couldn't go but they did bring me back dinner. I debated ordering the Breakfast of Champions appetizer (potato skins with brie and smoked bacon) or perhaps the Light in the Attic salad (spinach, gorgonzola, and bacon) but settled on the Hamlet sandwich (prosciutto and smoked cheddar), and it is DELICIOUS.

J ordered the Tyler Durden (black and blue ribeye with gorgonzola sauce and redskin smashed potatoes); B got the Huck Finn sandwich (pulled pork). Rave reviews all around. Off to eat my drippy, salty, tasty prosciutto sandwich. Cheers!