Sunday, June 08, 2008
"...but I ain't up to my baby tonight, 'cause it's too darn hot!"*
Rules for the wading pool
Do not put your peanut butter and jelly sandwich in the water.
Do not dump your glass of lemonade in the water.
Or throw it at your brother.
Grapes do not float. Do not put them in the wading pool.
Pretzels do float. Do not put them in the wading pool.
You must keep your swim trunks/swim diaper on at all times.
Preferably covering your butt crack.
Do not try to balance your book on the side of the wading pool.
Do not try to lift one side (or the other) of the wading pool.
Do not throw water at my car.
Do not scoop up soggy bits of peanut butter and jelly sandwich and fling it at my car.
Or your brother.
Do not hit your brother with your water pistol.
Do not throw your water pistol.
You know what, maybe the water pistols weren’t such a great idea.
Do not pee outside.
Do not pee on, near, or around your brother’s shoes.
Do not splash or throw or shoot water near your mom, who is holding the baby.
Note to mom: baby does not like to have feet dipped in ice cold water. Imagine.
Do not drink the pool water.
Do not pour cups of water down the front of your swim suit.
No one wants to see your errant willy.
Which, come to think of it, is a good piece of advice to generally live by.
"Too Darn Hot," from "Kiss Me Kate" (Cole Porter)